I remember the wide-eyed days at the age of 12 when I dreamt about 21. The job, college and fast-paced life. The appearance of security that came with adulting, making decisions and flashing my ‘I-can-have-a-glass-of-wine’ card. It all seemed so beautiful. A journey, like Cinderella… except the part of the evil step-mother lasts a lot longer than I remember.

And man, do I have a number of revelations.

Granted, I may not be up the ladder on my cycles around the sun. 21 is only but a small number. Yet, I’ve come to the point of my life where I’m going to give more love, care and encouragement to the world. Not because of the evil in the world, but because there is so much hope to come out of our future.

1. Dream your wildest dreams and work hard. Hard work pays off.

But don’t let this 1+1 equation fool you. Dreams and hard work are like a relationship full of commitment, growth and mistakes. There are nights that will be long & lonely. You just need to decide which are worth it.

2. Finances. Finances. Finances.

I won’t lie, I never knew a thing about taxes, credit or financial stability. I use to be afraid of checking my bank balance. But like all problems, it only goes away if you solve it. Lately, I’m reading up on financial stability, asking questions and turning down things I can’t afford.

There’s nothing better than having money. There’s nothing worse than losing money. Decide what is important. Spend wisely and never allow anyone to bully you on your choices.

3. Who is with you? Who is against you?

Decide today who are your friends, foes, acquaintances, partner and bystander.

Each person does play a role in your life but it is up to you to choose whether they have an impact.

Friends need to actually be friends. Regardless of shape or form, they have to be your supporters, pushers(positively), parents(somtimes), muse & so much more. I no longer loosely throw that term around. A friend is a friend, know who they are and keep them close.

Don’t waste your time on foes and enemies. They are not worth the wait.

Love your partner. And acknowledge your bystanders. Just because they are standing by doesn’t mean they are a wallflower. People have feelings too.

4. Joy counts.

What brings you true joy? Find it and keep it.

5. Health is best. Healthy mind, body, spirit and heart. We only have 1 body, one mind, 1 spirit & one heart. Don’t lose yourself in the chaos.

I’d like to give credit to myself for everything but I’d be lying. Some days are good and I can take over the world. Other days I cry in the shower or forget to eat.

But God, in his love & goodness is always there, ready to catch me.

Truth is we are all taking the same course. Adulting 101 isn’t easy but you never have go through it alone. And if you fall you can always get back up.

Oh, I’m still wide-eyed about the dreams. Don’t lose sight of your dreams.

-Written by Cecilia-karen W’emedi